If Only
by Callie
Summary: GlamourSerena - a little bit of insight into her coldness.


**Note: **Serena/Glamour, Feannan and her parents are MINE. Kristain, Jase and Ice are also mine. :P I shall hiss at you if you say otherwise. The blond at the end belongs to Julzie darlin'. Lyrics are from 'The Places You Have Come To Fear The Most' by Dashboard Confessional.

* * *

_Such a charming, beautiful exterior,,_

_Laced with brilliant smiles and shining eyes..._

_Perfect posture but you're barely scraping by. _

..._You're barely scraping by..._

* * *

Quiet music slipped from the hi-fi, just loud enough to hear, and a girl of fifteen stood with long and shiny black hair, in the centre of the room. Darkness was slowly settling outside as she dressed in silence. Soon she was clad in a short skirt with army boots and a low-cut top. Her nails were painted black like her lips and eyes. She turned the music of, picking up a bag and exiting the room.

Almost noiselessly, she crept down the stairs and outside into the front garden. She shut the door with a clink and walked across the frosty grass to a waiting BMW.

"Glamour, you're late, _again_." said the girl with spiky blond and black hair in the front seat, who immediately pressed down on the pedal, the car speeding of.

"I'm here, aren't I?!" she snapped.

Glamour took a brush from her back and a tie, pulling her hair back into a high ponytail. It was already covered in shining serum and it seemed to glitter when it caught the light.

"What, no baby sister tonight?" Asked an equally blond guy in front who's name was Ice.

"Hell no, you fucker." she muttered, finding a pack of cigarettes and lighting one.

"Didn't she tell you those were bad for your health?" Came a voice next to her, she turned to see the raven haired Jase. Rolling her eyes, Glamour gave him the finger and continued to smoke.

* * *

Soon the car pulled up next an apparently disused field. "Come on." the blond girl muttered, slamming the car door. The three followed and started trekking across the field. Soon they came to a guy who was lying on the ground, staring at the stairs. They dug in their pockets for something and each produced a small see-through packet, filled with white stuff. They threw them at the guy. He stood up. "Too kind." he said with a grin. He ushered them away for a moment.

"What does he use that stuff for, anyway?" wondered Jase.

"It's obvious he's not an addict..." Glamour shrugged and tossed her cigarette away.

"Yeah..." they shrugged and a sound of a metal could be heard, then a shout from the guy.

The group returned to him and stared at the hole in the ground, wondering what they'd find down their tonight. "You know the drill. No fights, no showy displays...You get me?" they all nodded. "Fine. Have fun."

The girl entered first, climbing down the ladder, rung by rung. Ice followed Jase, finally Glamour herself descended. The metal door clanged shut above them, shutting out the last remains of natural light.

Glamour jumped the last few steps, her boots landing in small pool of dirty water. The sewer was dark, but vaguely clean. Thumping music could be heard in the distance, and a small row of neon blue strip lights flickered on above their heads as they stood.

"All right on, princess." Jase teased, grabbing Glamour's hand and started walking down the passage. She shook him of and pushed him away.

"Hahah. I think not." she muttered and started walking down the sewer on her own, following the faint footsteps of Ice and the girl, Kristain.

After a few minutes of walking in blue neon-lit semi-darkness, she came to a pair of heavy industrial metal doors. She smiled, hearing the roaring music clearly now, shouts and talking could also be heard, and the distinct smell of alcohol added to everything. She pulled one of the doors open, and stepped in with a smile.

Letting the doors swing shut behind her, Glamour pushed her way through the sweating, moving, dancing mass of people. She let out a laugh as she saw Kristain, set fire to a guy at the bar because he looked at her. She stifled a giggle and made her way over.

Sliding into a gap next to her she ordered something strong and alcoholic, not caring what the bartender gave her as long as it got her trashed. She lit another cigarette. "Having fun, Kris?" she wondered, blowing smoke into the air.

"More so than you, it looks." the girl said, downing a glass of something pink and vodka-smelling.

Glamour raised and dropped a shoulder. "Eh...I guess it'll get better. It's all the annoying people here now...Like him." she gestured in the direction of the guy Kristain had just set alight. He was standing a good 10 metres away now, throwing looks of contempt and resentment their way.

"Heh...Yeah. I know what you mean." She swallowed more of her drink. "Here give us one of them." she indicated the cigarette. Glamour gave her one and offered Kristain her lighter. She declined it, letting a flame flicker up from her hand, catching on to it, and eating away at it.

She smiled and looked away. She let her eyes drift over the scene, pinpointing various persons she knew. She spotted Jase in the corner, and grinned, jumping up. Jase knew how to have fun.

"Come on, dance with me." she said once she reached him. She grabbed his hands, pulling him into the horde of people, and started dancing madly. Laughing, he joined in.

* * *

Later that night she collapsed with Jase on one of the sofas, breathing heavily, giggling. She was only slightly drunk, and hyper. She looked up at Jase, grinning. The room was starting to empty now though the music was still playing. Kristain and Ice were sitting together at the bar, playing with Kristain's powers and their laughter could be heard clearly.

Smiling, Jase slipped his arms round Glamour's thin waist. "Did anyone ever tell you that you're really hot?" he wondered, twisting his head round to looking into her deep grey eyes.

She let out a laugh and chewed her lip. "You just did." she shrugged with a smile. They were quiet for a few moments whilst Glamour admired his beautiful green-y blue eyes.

Suddenly there was a loud bang of a stool falling over, and Ice stormed out of the room, Kristain following. Frowning, Glamour was tempted to follow, but Jase's warm grip on her made her think twice. She turned back to him, smiling. "Lets go outside." she said, pulling him up and back down the sewer.

He climbed up the ladder first, the door was open, and then sat on the edge, offering a hand to her as she climbed up. The guy was still sitting there, counting his packets. The two shared a look before quickly moving away. They found a place near some trees, with some soft grass, and Glamour fell backwards, hitting the ground with a thud.

"Hey, hey! Be careful, gorgeous!" he laughed, flopping down next to her, lying on one side with his elbow propping him up. She grinned, her black lips twitching up in a smirk. She put he hands behind her head and crossed her ankles.

"Nah..." she laughed, feeling her skin tingle as he placed a hand on her abdomen, his slight fingers gently stroking her stomach and playing with the hem of her shirt. She smiled, sitting up and leaning against the tree. "Come here, you..." she murmured, pulling him towards.

She hesitated a moment, before leaning forward, kissing him. She noticed the shock in his eyes, before he kissed her back. Moments later, he broke the kiss, crying out in pain. "Jase?!!" she said, worriedly. "Jase! What's wrong?!" she reached for him, grabbing his hands, but he only screaming more, his body convulsing.

"Don't!" he managed through the overwhelming pain. She moved her hands away, scared and her face showed it.

"Jase...What's wrong?" she asked, gently touching his arm with her fingertips. He moaned and she removed them. Soon his convulsing stopped, and then suddenly breath failed him. He lay still on the grass. Horrified, Glamour screamed, and started to run away, blinking back tears.

She tripped once or twice, her vision blurry. Pain was twisting itself round her heart, making her gasp for breath. Pulling herself to her feet, she ran again.

Glamour reached Kristain's car, seeing Ice and her kissing nearby. She grabbed her bag from the ground, finding her car-keys and leaping into the car. Ignoring her friends shouts she backed up, and put her foot down, wanting to get home as soon as possible.

* * *

Leaving the car parked at a bad angle on the kerb, she raced up the path to her house, and let herself in. She moved upstairs quickly and quietly, shutting her bedroom door by leaning on it.

Then she broke down, tears falling from her eyes misty slate eyes. She slid down the floor, crumpling on the floor. Why her...? She didn't want another power. Sobbing, she dragged herself to her bed, pulling the sheets tightly around her, wanting to feel numb...

* * *

Slumping downstairs the next morning with the remnants of last night's make-up on her face, she slunk into the kitchen, sitting down at the breakfast bar she held her head in her hands.

_Darling_ little sister Feannan was already there. The black eyed girl looked at her older sister for a moment, before fixing another pot of coffee. She waited until it was done before passing her a warm mug of the black stuff.

"Here..." Feannan received a mumbled 'thanks' as she watched her gulp the hot liquid down, gratefully. "Bad night, Serena?" she wondered, seeing her tear streaked cheeks.

Glamour cringed upon hearing her real name. The stupid, prissy parents they had gave them the most stupid names. Feannan and Serena? It sounded like something out a friggin' fairytale. She nodded weakly.

"You have no idea." Feannan kept quiet for a few moments, wondering what possibly could've got to Serena. She always looked dishevelled after a night-out with her weird friends, but she looked heart-broken this morning. She stepped away, hearing the doorbell ring.

"That'll be my friends...Mum and dad get back at four, I'll be back around six." she told her, wondering if she took any of it in. The figure hunched over a mug starting to sob nodded. "Okay...Feel better, Serena.." she mumbled, before going to meet a group of friends at the door.

Feannan smiled nervously at the blond guy who was there. "Hey..." she mumbled, slightly taken aback by his piercing eyes.

* * *

_Such a stellar monument to loneliness,_

_Laced with brilliant smiles and shining eyes..._

_Perfect make-up but you're barely scraping by. _

..._You're barely scraping by..._

* * *

**Note**: Whoo, so what do you think? There might be more but I dunno. Review me?! Love ya, Cal.


End file.
